Quite a Character - Dr. Gerry Lewis

I’ve been sitting on this for over a month…

because I want to approach it in a helpful and encouraging way.

Two of the photos attached to this post are the front and back of a “business card” I found tucked under my windshield wiper on a cold winter day.

I’m not exactly sure where it happened because I didn’t pull it out and look at it until I got home. It was really cold outside and I had made several stops.

I’m not a great detective, but I detected that someone REALLY didn’t like the way I parked on one of my stops.

A little context:

I drive an extended cab pickup. It’s not a massive one, but it definitely fills a parking spot and it’s easy to be a little off in a crowded parking lot no matter how hard I try to do it well.

And I DO try. I know what it’s like to be frustrated because someone parked so close to my door that I couldn’t get in on the driver’s side.

And since Mrs Sweetie is in a wheelchair and her van has a side ramp, I know how frustrating it is for someone to park in (or too close to) the striped ramp spot so that there is not room for her to get in or out.

All that to say, I’m very aware of those situations and try really hard to not create parking problems for anyone else. I worry WAY more about inconveniencing people than I do about my own inconveniences.

So, my first thought when I read the front of the card was, “Oh, no! What did I do?”

I turned the card to find out. As you can see, it was no help.

Then I just got mad.

And that’s why I waited to share.

Here’s why I’m sharing:

I could have just thrown it away and never brought it back up, but I saw a learning opportunity.

What must be going on in someone’s life that would make them think it was a good idea to invest in a stack of these personally insulting cards? According to this card, I’m an “idiot” who “sucks at parking” and needs to be reminded that I “share the earth with other people.”

Now, I would suggest that I have 63 years of living and 47 years of driving that offers objective evidence that none of the above applies.

But this person doesn’t know me, so his or her opinion of me is formed by how I parked one time—and that one time is the only thing that matters to them.

And what must be going on in someone’s life to make them leave the back side unmarked so that there is nothing that can be corrected—all that remains is the personal insults?

HERE’S THE LESSON:

The card says more about that person’s character than it does about my parking.

We live in a world where insults and outrage have become the most common ways to deal with differences and disappointments; a world where we are quick to criticize and condemn and slow to seek understanding; a world where it’s ok to engage in despicable behavior as long as we can “whatabout” the other side; a world where retaliation, rather than thoughtful response, is the default.

So, here are a couple of questions for us:

What do criticisms and complaints directed toward us reveal about the critics?

What do our criticisms and complaints reveal about what’s going on in our own lives?

I remember hearing author and pastor, Rick Warren, say that a big turning point for him was when he changed his question from “What’s wrong with you?” to “What happened to you?”

As the saying goes, “Hurt people hurt people.”

Of all the commands Jesus mentioned, there is only one that He identified as “my” command.